Viva La Vida Ma Africano

What does it take to attract an African man? Simple I say – through a careful observation, these I have concluded to be true to a heart’s desire … a few tactics to be applied like science chemistry and you could have them stamping at your doorsteps like a swamp of breeding butterflies heading for the sweet nectar of a brightly coloured flower. So what are they … let me whisper into your ears – being a domestic woman is essential because most African men were raised in families where mothers took good care of them and filled their stomachs with good food. Spick and span is the next best thing. Cleanliness is a virtue that attracts the attention of most African men. So it is good to keep clean at all times … be it at heart, soul and mind to be in their spotlight. Besides, being organised is an expectation in high demand especially from self-appearance to household management and most would view you under the prism of a great and reassuring woman, who would definitely make a good domestic administrator, a caring mom and a committed wife to have and to hold or else it could be a real turn off. Next, on the slope is no smoking or even drinking heavily because that signals recklessness in the eyes of most African men as an unhealthy habit. Thus, if you are the type, God gracious, trust me they would hardly dream of coming back. Always be honest in what ever situation as that virtue goes a long way with African men and they are sure to shower you with unyielding love, hence they would adore and keep you in their hearts at all times. Listen and speak with due respect to their African heritage. The relationship enhances well when you strive to name their children with African names and even add a religious name. Most African men come from very closely-knit family and would return home to visit their families and friends in their cherished memories as follows it is always good to be kindly supportive, embrace and even join them when they return to their homeland.  Above all, be a modest woman in charge, let him be the man, husband and father of your lovely children and he would be there for you and your children as that is nearly every African man’s ultimate goal. Cheers!

Culturally Divided Together We Stand ...

Some things are worth sharing with family and friends … and I thought I would share this piece of worthy reading I came across whilst on a short vocation sometime back and it swiftly drifted back into my memory while I was pondering over an article titled “Love Without Borders” which talks about marriages that bridge the cultural divide where love knows no borders.

A successful marriage requires a mix of
COMPATIBILITY,  CHEMISTRY,  COMMITMENT,  COMMUNITY,  COMMUNICATION    and  COMPASSION.

Let’s look at each and every element what it has to offer:

Compatibility - a set of interests and values that establishes a common ground between two people.

Chemistry - indefinable attributes that make two people ‘click’ with each other.

Commitment - an explicit and implicit understanding that both partners are dedicated to making the relationship work.

Community - a network of family and friends to support and nurture the relationship.

Communication - an effort to express feelings and share experiences with each other.

Compassion - a human quality that becomes all the more important for developing a successful relationship.

Well I suppose these elements are essential towards seeking friends and building the rapport amongst colleagues in the working environment too. As it is always quoted in old poetic English “birds of a feather flock together”. It is indubitably TRUE folks. Be it at home, at work or even at places of worship.

Intelligence above all ...

We humans pride ourselves with being the most intelligent and creative of God’s earthly creatures. That is undeniable but man has since time immemorial sought to or inevitably learnt from the animals. 
For instance bats are blind but whose flight paths are guided by radar – from whence the modern radar based its principles on. The penguins in Antarctica look after the young while the females go missing for time on end – as study shows to replenish her nourishment. The Chinese brought martial to greater and advantageous heights simply by learning from various animals and incorporating their moves into fighting skills. Examples can go on and on and truly, man ought to take its cue sometimes, learning from animals.

Animals are not pretentious! They may be full of antics designed mainly as sign languages. They are not conniving though animals in packs are known to plan ambush. They are not mean! When they rebuke or fight, it is generally for survival or propagation reasons.

They don’t cheat! Though they could be cunning but then again it is for strategic reasons. They are not ungrateful! Rarely do they bite the hands that feed them. They are loyal and have been known to sacrifice themselves purely out of love.

They don’t abuse their young! Lions are known to devour their cubs but again predominantly for sexual reasons since the lioness will not mate when she has cubs. Animals are not avaricious! They will eat their share, accumulate none (except for winter ration nuts) and leave scraps and pieces to other scavengers.

Animals don’t back stab! They would usually confront or run away from any compromising events. They are not malicious except perhaps for leopards that are known to hunt for sport. 

They don’t cause environmental carnage just out of greed or disregard. They are easily satisfied too! They don’t destroy in order to build! They fight fair and don’t use weapons! Few are aggressive or antagonistic! There is no bribery! There is no incarceration! There is no blackmail! They kill for self-preservation but don’t murder. They don’t persecute or torture! They don’t bear false witness! They are guided by their natural instincts and seem to learn pretty fast too. They can be apologetic but don’t know embarrassment.

Listen closely, for through them God speaks!

The list can go on and on. But the good side to man is also ever as endearing. There is love, charity and sacrifice. The corruption on man’s knowledge and consciousness is the issue. Conscience can be subdued. Therefore some would like to equate Adam and Eve’s episode with the apple symbolizing the “fruit of knowledge”. Once knowledge is awaken it gives rise to the other ills.

But personally, most humans resort to dastardly acts simply because they have not the conviction of faith in the after-life! “Do all you want for after death comes nothing” seems to be more like it – knowing fair well that they would not be able to take their possessions to the grave! Perhaps so, but since this is the only life they are going to get, why not live with dignity. Why be a ‘hypocrite’?

Character Amnesia

In life ... many a times we come across all sorts of people from different walks of life. Some bring you good times and there are a number that permits suffering. And there are a few that appear to have "character amnesia" of a different sort. When faced with a dilemma, they seem to 'forget' the right thing to do and instead choose the easy way out. No character is who we are; it's not something we 'forget'. Those who have a loss of character make a choice.

Life is not always that fair. 
When wealth is gone, little is lost;
when health is gone, something is lost;
but when character is gone, all is lost!


















Watch your thoughts, for they become words.
Watch your words, for they become actions.
Watch your actions, for they become habits.
Watch your habits, for they become character.
Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.

I Said A Prayer For You Today

This was especially written and dedicated to my loving mother on her Birthday - June 15, 2011

I said a prayer for you today

and know God must have heard.

I felt the answer in my heart

although He spoke not a word.

I did not ask for wealth or fame,

(I knew you would not mind).

I asked for priceless treasures rare

of a more lasting kind.

I prayed that He would be near

to you and at the start of each

new day, to grant you health and

blessings fair, and loved ones

to share your way.

I asked for happiness for you,

in all things great and small.

But that you would know His

loving care, I prayed the most of all.

Marriage A Lifetime Commitment

Actions, good or bad, spring from thoughts, and thoughts are greatly influenced by one’s good values. Good values influence good thoughts, and good thoughts lead to good behavior and acceptable and desirable actions.

The same goes for love, relationship and marriages. Love does not choose ages. We want, and we will be, together as long as God allows us. It is companionship and understanding that you need the most, and having someone through the good and bad times, that is something that you get with marriage. For a marriage to work, there should exist the room for adjustment and compromise on both sides. Communication that is free and open is vital to any lasting and fulfilling relationship.

Some say marriages may be made in heaven, but no one ever promised that they would survive on earth. It may sound like a cynical thing to say but that is what is known as reality. Nobody wishes for or expects their marriage to crumble. But it happens! So one can be fairly sure that he who destroys marriage destroys the civilization.

A marriage is something which exists primarily because each partner has postulated its existence and its continued existence. Only with this foundation in place are marriages successful. Marriages is not how you forget but how you forgive. It is not about how you listen but how you understand. It is not about how you see but how you feel. And lastly, it is not about how you let go but how you hold on right till the end.

Thus, ending a marriage is not a solution towards a trifling problem. Marriage is a lifetime commitment that must be sheltered with much care, concern and caution. We must realize that it is as precious as a new born. And remember a strong marriage will know that it takes longer than you planned, it costs more than you figured, it is messier than you anticipated and it requires greater determination than you expected; ….

                         By wisdom a house is built,
                         And by understanding it is established;
                         And by knowledge the rooms are filled
                         with precious and pleasant riches.